Chapter 8
Monday, May 11th, 2015 Surgery Day.
Laura had to be at the hospital by 6 A.M. So I wanted to be sure to catch her before she left.
This was my 5:00 text…
‘Well I have thought all night on what I want to say to you this morning. I always have something to say on those big days. The only thing that kept coming to my mind was this…
‘You have had everything you have ever needed all along. You have had Faith. You have had Hope and you have Love’. There have been so many people supporting you and cheering you on.
Laura was the one about to undergo a major surgery and she was the one with the comforting words. She answered me back that morning saying… “Yes, I have. Just Believe. I do. Everything is going to be ok. I am okay and I slept good. I can do this and whatever else comes my way.”
This is another example of the positive attitude Laura maintains. There may be times when she gets down, but she always picks herself back up. Her life represents a life based on faith.
When I woke up this morning, I wasn’t sure how I would feel. I was expecting to be worried, but I wasn’t. I too was putting my trust in God.
Soon I was off to work. I got in the Jeep and glanced over at the necklace that hangs from my rearview mirror. The clasp had fallen to the bottom. I did what I always do, I pulled it to the top and said a prayer. I feel like those are the times God gets my attention, reminding me to Believe.
I pulled into the school parking lot and walked thru the door. I said my ‘Good Mornings’ to all the teachers. I could tell everyone was worried about Laura. The children hadn’t arrived yet, school wasn’t to start for another 30 minutes. Everyone came in my room so we could talk about Laura. I could see the concerned look on their faces. They were worried about their friend. They wanted her to be alright. Everyone was ready for this to be over.
Before long, everyone was off to their own classrooms. One of our friends stayed in the room with me. I could tell she was upset. I shared with her a story from my past.
This is the reason why I remind Laura to Believe…
A few years ago, my mom had to have heart surgery. She wasn’t feeling well so the Doctor decided to do some tests. It was determined that she had been having some ‘mini” heart attacks. She had no knowledge of them, she never felt she was that sick. He informed her she would need some stents put in as soon as possible. He said without them she could have a major heart attack. He told her we caught this in time.
My parents live at The Lake of the Ozarks, so we took off a couple of days from work to be with her. The procedure was to take place the day after Valentine’s Day, which happened to be on my Dad’s birthday. We were all confident she was going to be just fine. Like I said she didn’t seem that sick. It wasn’t long after she was taken back, the Doctor came out to talk with us. He said she is worse off than they had first thought. My mom had blockages in several of her arteries. He informed us she would be staying overnight. He scheduled her for open heart surgery the following morning. We didn’t have time to think. My mom was having a surgery you only hear about other people having. You never think about it happening to one of your own.
We arrived at the hospital early the next morning. Before we knew it, she was off to surgery. The Doctor who performed the bypass told us it should take around 3-4 hours. My Mom’s took over 5. You think about all the things that could go wrong when you’re watching the clock pass the 4-hour mark. The only word we had was… She is still in surgery. Everything is going fine. The Doctor will be out to talk with you soon. Your heart starts to sink a little because this is taking longer than he said. You can’t help but think the worst. You’re scared and you feel all alone. You put on a ‘tough face’ because you don’t want your Dad to worry. Inside, I am praying every minute that I can.
This part I can’t remember because it has been so many years. She had a four or five by-pass surgery. He also repaired a leaking aortic value. Add to that… He closed a hole in her heart. This is something he said she has had since birth. None of this they knew anything about, not until they opened her up and looked inside.
Immediately they transferred us to a different waiting room. The next several hours all we could do was wait. Visiting hours were over and we still couldn’t go in to see her. We had been waiting and worrying the entire day. Other families were called back to see their loved ones. Ours was still anxiously waiting.
I had gone out to the car to make a phone call to check on the kids. It was late and I wanted to talk to them before bed. As Clint and I were about to head back into the hospital, my Dad and brother came walking outside. They said they had just been in to see her. She was doing good but wasn’t fully awake. She only opened her eyes for a few minutes. I said, ‘Good. We’ll go in to see her now.’ My brother stopped me and said, “Why don’t you wait until tomorrow morning. Trust me, you don’t want to see her like this. She has tubes and wires coming out of her everywhere, anyways right now she is asleep.”
It was late and we were all exhausted. Clint and I left to get something to eat. My brothers stayed with my Dad at his house. He lives about 45 minutes away. Clint and I got a room at a Hotel across the street from the hospital. It something would happen where she needed us, we would be there in a hurry.
The next morning, we all got to go in to see her. I thought she looked great! All the tubes were gone and only a couple of wires remained. At times she was talking out of her head. That scared us. She wasn’t making any sense. The nurse said this was normal, not to worry. She said, “That’s the pain medicine talking. It’s some pretty strong stuff.”
For the first couple of days my mom seemed to be doing fine. Then two days after her surgery, the Doctor wanted a meeting with the family before we could see her. He said she had multiple blood clots in both of her lungs. He wanted us to prepare ourselves since she may not make it through the night.
I remember that moment like it was yesterday. Nervously, I began to shake. I was scared. We all were. This wasn’t the news any of us were expecting to hear. All I could think of was she might die. The Doctor said these next 24 hours will tell. We are hoping the medicines will work.
It was time to go in to see her. I had to get myself together. Good Lord I couldn’t let her see me shake. I put on a brave face walked into her room acting like everything was fine. My mom already knew what was going on. She told us the same thing the Doctor said. We tried to act like everything was going to be fine. We didn’t treat her any different than we would normally do. She didn’t let on she was worried either.
I couldn’t make myself look her in the eyes that night. I was afraid of what I might see. My mom has always been very strong and confident. I didn’t know if I could handle to see her afraid. I gave her a hug and told her I would see her in the morning. She smiled at me and said goodnight.
As we were leaving the hospital I began to pray. I prayed like I never have before. I can’t lose my mom. I need her. God please hear my prayers. Clint thought it would be best if we would try to eat some dinner. I just sat there in the restaurant with my head down on the table. I don’t remember feeling anything. My entire body felt numb.
God spoke to me later that night. I felt it deep in my heart. He told me to ‘Believe’. So that’s what I did. I did what God asked me to do. I chose to Believe.
The next morning, we returned to the hospital. Clint and I were the first ones there. We walked through the door of her room to see her sitting up with a big smile on her face. She grins at us and says, “I almost didn’t make it last night, but I’m okay now.” The Doctor said she was in the clear. There were no signs of any blood clots anywhere. All of them were gone.
I will always remember that February night when God whispered to me… Believe. I hear that word quite often now. That word means something to me. I shared this story with Laura. That’s why I tell her to always believe. This morning when I got to work… I had to share this story again. I spoke of the necklace in my Jeep, that word and what it means to me. I hugged my friend as I told her it would be alright. I then shared the message Laura left with me.
I said…
‘Sometimes God will use the people we are praying for, to give us the message we need to hear.
5:30 this morning in Laura’s text, she told me… “Just Believe. I Do.” A comforting thought if you know what I mean.’
I have found that God will speak to us in a way we understand if we get quiet enough and listen. I knew Laura was going to be alright. All we had to do was Believe.
These past few months that word has become embedded in our hearts. It is something Laura and I remind each other to do. I stayed at work until the surgery was over. It was nice to not have to be alone. Preschool ended at noon, but the daycare was open until six. I went upstairs to sit in the office. Most any given day someone would be in there. For a short while I was by myself. While I was sitting there, I found myself looking at the decorations on the wall. I have been in that office hundreds of times and never noticed what I noticed that day.
Right above where Laura sits is a picture with the words ‘Faith, Hope & Love’. I smiled as I said to myself, ‘Imagine that.’ I continued to scan around the room. I stopped at a picture not far from the first. This picture read, ‘Always Believe’.
I guess God already knew the path this friendship would travel. He even knew the words that would have the most meaning. FAITH HOPE & LOVE and of course… BELIEVE.
Surgery was to begin at 11 A.M. and would last close to three hours. Rachel would send us girls updates, letting us know how everything was going.
When exactly three hours was up, that’s when Rachel’s text came through. Laura was out of surgery and in the recovery room. The surgery went well. Laura was doing good. We were all relieved to finally hear the news.
I told Laura the night before, I wouldn’t bother her so she could rest. I knew the girls would be in contact with us letting us know how things are going. I said, ‘Just text me when you are ready for company, then and only then, will I come up.’ Not long after Laura had returned to her room, I received a text from Rachel. “Mom is ready to see you. When can you come up?” I said, ‘Now?? I’m not coming up! This is time to be spent with family. I will come by in a few days.’ Rachel said, Dad has already gone home. It was just her and Amanda there. Mom wants you to come up. ‘Are you sure? Okay, tell her I will be up in a few.’ I honestly wasn’t expecting to go visit so soon.
Brandi wanted to come with me. Both of us were eager to see if she was doing okay. Before we left Rachel informed me with some interesting news… She said, “Now don’t laugh. Mom’s room is on the maternity floor.” I said, ‘With all the babies? And mothers to be?’ Yes, Laura’s room was nestled amongst all the pregnant mommies and newborn babies.
Well… That’s all I needed to hear to have a little fun. Brandi and I stopped at the hospital gift shop before we rode the elevator up. We walked through Laura’s door with a bright blue ‘Welcome the New Baby’ balloon in hand. I greeted Laura with a smile and said, ‘Congratulations on your new baby boy!’ Laura grinned and shook her head as I tied the new mom’s balloon to her bed rail. And if you know Laura… Well, she gave me one of those ‘looks.’ You know what look I’m talking about! One of those looks!! Oh, she wouldn’t admit it, but deep inside she loved it! How do I know this? Because it made it in the journal. It’s something she will never forget.
In all seriousness Laura looked really good. She didn’t look like a person who just came out of surgery. She was sitting up in bed when we got there. I was surprised to see her doing so well. I asked her how she felt. She said, “Mostly tired, a little sore, but not in any pain. That was such a relief to hear since all of us had been worried. It was good for Rachel and Amanda to hear too. They have been right by Laura’s side throughout this entire journey.
Brandi and I stayed for only a few minutes. We knew she needed to rest. While we were talking with the girls, Laura’s eyes would close, leading us to believe she was asleep. The fact is… She was listening to everything we were saying. Those eyes of hers would open up, if she didn’t agree with what we were saying. One of those… ‘Oh hell no’s!’ like Laura would say. We were all just looking out for what is best for her, whether she likes it or not.
Before we left, I told Laura a funny story that happened at work. One of our preschool parents asked Ms. Stacey how Laura was doing. Stacey informed this parent that Ms. Laura was in the hospital having a vasectomy. Stacey’s words got mixed up! She said, No! Mastectomy not Vasectomy!! It was a good laugh! Actually… It was a great laugh!! Something we all needed.
(I want to speak here in Stacey’s defense. Ms. Stacey teaches the 3 & 4-year olds. Today was a very hectic day. Funny & hectic. We love ya Stace!)
Laura’s journal entry she wrote about today…
“Slept good. Got up and got ready. At the hospital by 6 A.M. Got checked in and waited. They called me back and I got ready (changed my clothes to the lovely hospital gown). Dr. Be. decided not to do the neuro med injection. Going ahead and do the full lymph node removal. Surgery went well. Took 3 hours or so. Don’t remember much from this day. Had some visitors. Then heard a funny story about Ms. Stacey and a preschool parent…
So Today, I had a vasectomy, a baby, and a mastectomy. Not too many people can say they have had all three in one day! That was our laugh for the day!”
The following morning, I got an early text. Now remember, this is the day AFTER her surgery. Laura was asking me how I was doing. I said, ‘I’m fine. Why are you asking me that? I’m the one that should be asking you.’ We talked for a little while about how she was feeling and if she was able to get any sleep. She told me they had given her pain medicine but felt she really didn’t need it. She took it anyway just in case. I thought that was a good idea and told her to take it if you can. I have always been told it’s best to be ahead of the pain, it’s easier to control. Laura said her spirits were up and she was ready to go home. She was eagerly waiting for all the Doctors to make their rounds.
The Physical therapist came in and explained the exercises he wanted her to do at home. This was important for pain management and mobility as she began to heal. Soon a nurse was in explaining how to empty each drain tube and then informed her about at home care. Finally, Laura’s Doctor came in and said everything looked good.
Laura was discharged a little over 24 hours after her surgery. She left the hospital with three drain tubes coming out of her chest, two on the right side one on the left. Her pain was under control and now she needed to heal. Laura’s mom stayed with her today, this made her feel at peace.
Going home a different woman than she was when she left… Laura was okay with. Living life was more important.